Polis Menangis Disergah Pencuri

Selalunya penjenayah yang kecut perut sewaktu berdepan polis ketika sesi soal siasat berlaku. Akan tetapi, apa pula yang akan berlaku jika anggota polis yang ketakutan sehingga menangis kerana disergah oleh pencuri yang kurang adab??

Jangan tertipu dengan tajuk, ye! Sebenarnya ini adalah sebuah program hiburan yang disiarkan oleh Jiangsu Television di China.

Berikut ialah terjemahan video di atas :-

POLICEWOMAN:
This is the weapon he used to commit the crime.
I’ll put it here for now.
I have some business to take care of and must leave for a while.
This criminal I’ll leave to you guys to watch.
Don’t let him escape, okay?

LITTLE BOY & GIRL IN POLICE UNIFORMS:
Okay. ["Scared" graphic appears by girl's face]

POLICEWOMAN:
I’m going to leave the key here, you mustn’t let him get a hold of it, okay?

CRIMINAL IN BLACK MASK:
She’s gone.
She’s gone.
She’s gone.

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t run!
[I] told you to not move!

CRIMINAL:
How many years have you two been police?

LITTLE GIRL:
[nervous] What?

CRIMINAL:
How many years have you been police?

LITTLE GIRL:
[crying] Don’t kill me!
You’re a good person!
When you speak, don’t sound too mean, okay?

CRIMINAL:
I don’t sound mean when I speak.

LITTLE GIRL:
[cries]
Okay, don’t be scary, okay?
I’m so scared!

CRIMINAL:
Little police officer, let’s just talk, okay?
Just let me say something.

LITTLE GIRL:
Are you a good person?

CRIMINAL:
I- I- I am a good person.
They arrested the wrong person.
Let me go, okay?

LITTLE GIRL:
No way, no way, no way!
She told me to watch over you.

CRIMINAL:
Yeah, but she arrested the wrong person, I’m a good person.
How about this, police officer?
You let me go, okay?

LITTLE GIRL:
[swallows] I doesn’t matter if you are a good person or a bad person you need to stay locked up.

CRIMINAL:
[graphic "But I am innocent~"] But if I am a good person, why lock me up?
I was just outside helping an old lady cross the road
But she says I am trying to steal the old lady’s purse.
Now she has arrested me and this isn’t right.

LITTLE GIRL:
It’s right!

CRIMINAL:
I’m just helping an old lady cross the street, so why did she arrest me?

LITTLE GIRL:
She’s acting! [graphic: "It's for television~"]
When the acting is done, you’ll be released.
If you don’t believe me, just wait and see, okay?

CRIMINAL:
I’m telling you,
this is my weapon, [graphic: Red Wolf asking "Flat bottom pan?"]
do you know who I am? [coughs]

LITTLE GIRL:
[wailing] He’s escaping!

LITTLE BOY:
[graphic] Resist/fight back!

CRIMINAL:
Wait, why are you afraid of me holding a pan? [graphic: "I haven't even hit you yet"]

LITTLE GIRL:
Let’s sit down and talk,
please don’t hit me, okay?

CRIMINAL:
That’s fine, that’s fine, will you free me?

LITTLE GIRL:
I can’t, I don’t know how to open handcuffs.

CRIMINAL:
How could you not know how to open handcuffs?!
I’m getting angry!

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t get angry! I’m scared!
I’m a cowardly person!

CRIMINAL:
You give me the key.
Where’s the key?

LITTLE BOY:
That’s the key right there.

CRIMINAL:
The key. Give it to me. Yes.

LITTLE GIRL:
Please speak a little more kindly, is that okay?

CRIMINAL:
This is the key, right? Let me see.
This is fine too, I’ll do it myself.

LITTLE GIRL:
Hey, don’t handcuff me, I’m scared.

CRIMINAL:
I will handcuff him to the chair.

POLICEWOMAN:
[graphic: "The police are coming!"] Why are you standing?!
Sit down! Sit down!

LITTLE GIRL:
[in response to the policewoman taking the criminal away] Okay, okay, okay.
You go with her.

Next Scene: STRANGE COUPLE

WOMAN:
Police officer, [pointing] he just slapped me twice.

MAN:
Didn’t we say we weren’t coming here? What are we doing here?

LITTLE GIRL:
[crying] Don’t fight, you two. You guys calm down, okay?
I’m really cold right now.
Let me finish crying before you argue again, okay?

MAN:
What are you crying about?

LITTLE GIRL:
I’m scared.

MAN:
What is there to be scared of?
In broad daylight?

LITTLE GIRL:
Don’t be angry.

MAN:
I’m not angry, I’m not angry.
No, the matter is like this, police comrade,
I as an artist am bound to have some unrestrained ideas,
and I will want to go put those ideas into practice.
But the moment I go put them into practice, she–

WOMAN:
Give me a break, what are you putting into practice?
All day looking like a devil, is this putting anything into practice?
Tell me, you guys, does he look like a man?

LITTLE GIRL:
He- he- he’s like a woman, his hair is even draped.

WOMAN:
You see, the police officer even says you look like a woman.

MAN:
[brushing his hair back] This, how is this like a woman?
This is an artist’s hair, don’t you know?
An artist must have his own style.

LITTLE BOY:
This is not an artist’s hair, it’s a police officer’s hair.

WOMAN & MAN:
[confused]

WOMAN:
He doesn’t do anything at home.
May I ask if people in your family help out at home?

LITTLE GIRL:
[nodding] They do.

WOMAN:
Do they help with a lot?

LITTLE GIRL:
They help with quite a lot. [graphic: "About to cry again"]

WOMAN:
Right, they help with quite a lot, right?

MAN:
[interrupting] I’m busy! It isn’t that I don’t want to help out…

WOMAN:
You’re busy?

MAN:
With my time, most of my time is spent creating!

WOMAN:
You’re begging to be beaten, you!

LITTLE BOY:
Both of you are begging to be beaten the way I see it!

WOMAN:
But I can’t go on with him any long, really.

LITTLE GIRL:
[reflective] Can’t go on…
For a woman…
this is called long-suffering [being patient, enduring], you understand, right?
You have already given [so you can't afford to give up now]…

MAN:
[triumphant] It was right to come here! Even the police say so. A woman must give.

WOMAN:
[crying] Even you are helping him bully/exploit me,
why are you helping him bully/exploit me?!

LITTLE GIRL:
I’m not afraid of you.

WOMAN:
Then you want me to do all these things by myself!
I’m going to beat you to death!
[accidentally removes MAN's wig]
Look, look, look!

LITTLE GIRL:
This is, this is a wig!
[pointing at the wig] You guys, you guys…

WOMAN:
He is a man yet he’s always wearing this thing, tell me…

MAN:
[pleading] Let’s go home first, let’s go home first.

LITTLE GIRL:
Hey, can you guys take this wig with you, okay?

LITTLE BOY:
This hair is so lousy.

LITTLE GIRL:
[It's] pretty.

Next Scene: GREY WOLF

GREY WOLF:
Hi you two!
Do you know who I am?

LITTLE BOY:
Grey Wolf!

LITTLE GIRL:
[scared/afraid]

Penulis ketawa mengekek melihat video ini. Ekspresi wajah dan dialog budak perempuan itu terlalu mencuit hati. Pasti anda juga terhibur, bukan??

©Eriyza : Masih mengingati seorang inspektor yang pernah menjadi teman tapi mesra.

Via : ChinaSmack